The Doggie Humor Collection

The Story of Howl-O-e'en

A long, long time ago, hoomins and doggies weren't friends. (I know this is hard to believe, but it's a fact!) Doggies back then weren't as nice as they are now, and the hoomins were a lot stinkier (most of 'em, anyway). This meant that neither doggies nor hoomins were furry happy. The doggies were sad because they didn't get good skritches or belly-rubbings, and 'specially cause they didn't get any T*R*E*A*T*S. Hoomins were sad onaccounta they couldn't see well in the dark and couldn't smell or hear much either, so nighttimes were scary for them - and they didn't have any warm doggies to cuddle up with and stay warm.

So the poor doggies would just stay out in the woods all night and howl their misery, and the howls would frighten the hoomins who were huddling in caves trying to stay warm.

Then one night there came a big thunder and frightening storm. The frightening came down and started a fire, and the hoomins all gathered 'round to look at it. They realized that it gave light and was warm, and they were furry happy and started singing songs. Then a smart hoomin tried cooking some meat over the fire, and it smelled goodgoodgood!!!

The wild doggies heard these happy songs and smelled the goodgoodgood meat cooking, and came to 'vestigate. As they arrived, the fire started to burn low. The hoomins threw on more wood, but pretty soon they ran out - it was too dark to go far from the fire to look for more! The fire got smaller and smaller, and the hoomins became cold and afraid and began to cry. They sounded very sad.

The doggies saw what was going on, though, and took pity on the hoomins. They sat down together and quietly woofed about the situation, until they came up with a plan.

The alpha leader of the doggies went into the dark woods and found the biggest stick he could lift. He carried this stick to the edge of the light around the hoomins' fire, then dropped it and sat down behind it. At first, the hoomins were frightened when they saw the wild doggie, but the wise alphadoggie just sat quietly until the hoomins calmed down. Then he started communicating with the hoomins: sniffing at the air, then licking his chops, then nudging the stick.

Soon, the alphahoomin figured it out. He got a piece of the meat cooking on the fire and threw it past the alphadoggie, who ran after it and gobbled it up. When the doggie chased after the meat, the hoomin quickly grabbed the stick and added it to the fire. This was the origin of what we now call "Trick for T*R*E*A*T" - the doggie had taught hoomins to give T*R*E*A*T*S in exchange for useful tricks!!

Then, another doggie went and got a stick and took it to the hoomins, and she got a T*R*E*A*T, too. Soon, all the doggies were running for sticks and getting T*R*E*A*Ts, and the fire grew nice and big and toasty. Before long all the doggies were tired from their fetching and had bellies full of warm T*R*E*A*T*S, and they wanted to be cozy. By this time, the hoomins had lost some of their fear of the doggies and would allow them close enough to touch. Finally, one hoomin got brave enough to touch one of the doggies, and felt how soft and warm her fur was. The hoomin couldn't resist rubbing that nice fur, and it felt so good that the doggie rolled over on her back. This was the first skritch, and the first belly-rubbing, too, and it cemented the friendship between doggies and hoomins forever.

Soon, all the hoomins had found a doggie to skritch and everyone and everydoggie was happy! The hoomins began singing again, and the doggies joined in with their howls. And that's why we remember the first night that doggies and hoomins spent together as Howl-O-e'en.

Of course, since doggies engineered the whole thing, hoomins remember it differently. To them, Howl-O-e'en was pretty scary, at least at first, so when hoomins talk about it they think of scary stuff like wicked witches and black cccccats. But they also carve faces in punkins and put little fires inside them to remember that first fire, and they give T*R*E*A*T*S to hoominpups who come to their dens wearing scary outfits, just like they gave T*R*E*A*T*S to those first scary wilddoggies.

by Gunner

Back to Humor index