1) Your jewelry box contains no jewels - just those fasteners from vari-kennels
2) Every time you read the name Bob, you think the guy's first name is Best of Breed
3) You ask your vet if you can ride in his/her sports car (that u paid for) sometime
4) Your house isn't carpeted - the fuzzy furballs under your feet are soft enough
5) Your hungry spouse comes home from work, lifts the cover of the pan on the stove and asks "Is this people food or dog food"?
6) Your hungry spouse once ate the dog food and asked for seconds
7) Your mother in law, family, relatives keeps asking when you are going to have real children
8) You don't give a second thought to using the brush you just used on your dog to give a quick run through your own hair
9) At your dinner parties, you always double check the butter for dog hair before putting it on the table
10) You put important papers in your latest issue of your breed magazine so you know you will find them there
11) You have dog hair stuck on tape on wrapping gifts
12) You have dog treats/toys in your briefcase or in pockets of your work suit
13) You have several albums filled with the 8x10 pictures of your dogs but can't find any pictures of your family for grandma
14) You show up to car dealers with a ruler to measure and see if your big dog crate will fit and before the actual purchase you make the dealer cringe by insisting that you load both crates and dog into the shiny new vehicle to make sure it works.
15) You can't get the groceries in the car because a) already full of dog food or b) you have that big dog crate in there
16) You visit relatives only if there is a dog show nearby
17) you remove all seats from the van except the front 2 so you have room for crates
18) The passenger seat is full of dog stuff
19) You cringe at the price of people food but think nothing of the cost of dog food or treats
20) You have six squeaky rats... but only 1 of them squeaks
21) Your mother knows the implication of a "major breaking"
22) You put popcorn in the clean dog dish for movie night
23) You pull out your credit card and little bits of liver are stuck to it
24) When you get your latest roll of film developed there isn't a single picture of a 2-legged person in it
25) People at work no longer offer you there lint brush. They realize it is a hopeless case.
26) Friends no longer ask "how was your weekend", they ask "how did the dogs do"
27) All babies and youngsters are "people puppies"